no papers

Zhivka did not come again today. Several weeks ago she started coming, hoping to learn how to make a hand craft, hoping to be able to earn money honestly. She hates being a prostitute. Early on, though, she had to fend for herself. Bulgaria was hard to grow up in, and her mother was not registered at birth, so she was never really married. The priest at the mosque officiated and that was that. So when she was born, she had no papers either. Her Turkish father was soon gone, though. Maybe he had always been temporary. She doesn't know. So her mother dropped her with her sister, and she had no papers. Bulgaria was hard to grow up in. Her aunt didn't want another mouth to feed. Muddy fields to plough, firewood to find, gather and haul for miles, often empty stores to shop for items that often weren't there... why add another mouth, especially a girl? So Zhivka left the only home she had ever known when she was 14.

Zhivka, living, life, the pleasure of life - why had this name come to her? Of all people? She left with a gypsy man who promised her a good life. They also were married by the priest at the mosque. This time she gained a mother-in-law. She was only 14 after all, so she believed in hope still, back then. But she soon found that she had only changed hands. Hauling wood, water, and goods to market and being pregnant that hot summer are things she pushes to the back of her memory. Because she had no papers, when her son was born, he was put on her mother-in-laws papers. By the time the child was weaned, she had been dumped by this husband, put out on the streets, because she refused to work in the ways he wanted. His drug and alcohol use had become frightening. She was glad to escape. But she could not take her son. He was on her mother-in-law's papers.

Coming to the big city seemed like a hopeful prospect. But a young girl on the streets is caught in a whirlwind of lies and financial lures. Before she knew what was going on, Zhivka was a prostitute. And it was a fellow prostitute who took compassion on her and brought her to us. The first few weeks, she kept working the night life and coming during the day. Trying to clear her head from the fog, she was seeking to wrap her mind around these new options. But in the second week they gave her alcohol made the cheap way, made the wrong way, made to poison.

Zhivka is very sick now, her kidneys may be shutting down. She doesn't know how to leave the bottle. Addictions and mind fog are hard to get clear from. She has no health insurance, she has no papers. She has no residence permit, she has no option of getting health care, she has no papers. Zhivka, the living, life, the pleasure of life... the path to life is hard right now. Sisters are on the way, bringing Jesus, bringing hope. Hold on to life, Zhivka, there is a Way forward!